I enjoy the fear

Fear sits in the hush before a decision

when the heart beats too loud

and the room feels too small.

*

It climbs the spine

when someone stands at the edge of a dream

wondering if the ground will hold or give way.

*

Fear flashes in the eyes of a child

when the lights go out

and every shadow grows teeth.

*

It sits in the pause

before someone admits they love

or they’re hurting

or they want more.

*

Fear lives in the silence of people

who lock themselves out of their own truth

because the truth asks for change.

*

It rests in the hands that shake

before signing a new beginning

or letting an old story end.

*

Fear echoes in the moment a person packs their bags

to leave a life they’ve outgrown

not knowing where their next breath will land.

*

And it breathes in me too

not because it owns me

but because it wakes me

It sharpens me

It teaches me to listen.

*

So yes

*

I enjoy the fear

not only the one in my chest

but the fear that moves through life itself

the kind that reminds us we are alive

that we are rising

that we are shifting shape in real time.

*

I enjoy the fear

because it is the current that pushes me forward

the whisper that asks,

are you ready?

And somehow

even trembling

I always answer yes.

*

If I could scream that I enjoy the fear,

the sound would travel farther than me rolling

through places where fear hides in corners

I’ve seen and corners I’ve only imagined..

-Nnenna