Who Will Be My Everyday

In every hour. In everything I love. In all that others admire. Who will be my everyday? The one who holds my hand and walks with me under the sun. Who will laugh and smile with me from morning to night, until the day fades quietly behind our backs.

Who will be my everyday?

The one who holds me close and keeps me warm. Who asks me my whys. Too involved in my depths. Too powerful in mind and soul to ignore how it all comes together, transforming us into something whole.

Who will kiss my feet, dress my skin, play in both treats and tricks, drawing us closer as we understand the rhythm of synchrony through our audible yeses and silent gestures? Who will be my everyday?

The one I can narrate tales of the day to. The one whose feet I can compel to dance while their smile brightens their eyes. The one I can comfort. The one I can talk to about what makes us, and what will make us us.

The one who remembers the passing days of our lives. Who can honor them and respect the thoughts and stories that shape our blessings.

Who will be my everyday?

Who will love me in red, blue, and green. Who knows that time does change. Who will be my everyday?

I ask myself this as I continue to journey through life, slowly realizing that nine times out of ten, the idea that you must reduce your standards is a lie. A dangerous one. I have to remember, I love what I love and who I love will understand that my love is never self-centered.

My love knows kindness. It knows understanding. It knows respect, approach, individuality, openness, fluidity but above all, it knows what love means.

So no, I will not lie to myself. Outside of morality, there is still preference. There is still truth. You cannot be Mary without the things you adore. So why pretend that you love without such order? You love what you love.

And that is okay.

Do not be sad that the one you hope for has not yet appeared. Just do not lower your standard because he has not been found. The one who will be your everyday will live out the dreams you whisper. The fantasies you keep close. Because they are aligned with your soul’s vibrancy.

The one who will be my everyday will know that being me has rarely been appreciated in the way I deserve. He will not only see that. He will use that knowing to remind me that I was never silly for holding on, even when I was starved for so long.

He will make it clear that my patience was not in vain. That what I long for is never too much. Just waiting to be met by someone who understands and chooses to show up. Every day.

-Nnenna